Yeh, this one’s personal.   It’s not pretty. Or detailed.   Or charming.  It’s just that when I saw that Jim had shot himself, it felt like the bullet passed right through him and blasted into my heart.    No blood.  The news was so fast and explosive and deep, it initially cauterized the emotions.    For several weeks I was in shock, numb, going through the actions and motions of planning the memorial service and sorting through his things so his grown kids could come in and take what they wanted.   I didn’t start to bleed until later. 

Sudden emotional trauma.       Anyone who has received shocking news of a loved one’s death or have experienced a tragic accident or a violent physical attack personally – perhaps a mugging or a rape – or like the Boston bombing victims – I imagine they could feel assaulted to the core.  Violated.    And you wonder how the crater will ever heal or be filled.    I had a couple of songs from classic rock in mind initially that now almost seem too trite to associate with this, but perhaps they could be adopted into a mash-up with a different arrangement that will tap into the darkness at the very core of this image.  Maybe some 18-yr-old grunge band punksters can scream this out.

Shot through the heart – and you’re to blame.

You give love a bad name. – Bon Jovi

There’s a hole in my heart that can only be filled by you.

And this hole in my heart can’t be filled with the things I do.

Hole Hearted.  Hole Hearted. – Extreme

The news was so sudden, so traumatic that the emotional crater was cauterized at the time. 

 The bleeding didn’t start until later.